on a break in Europe. all orders ship from February 2027.

we’re closed. (sort of.)

After 7 long years, we’re taking a proper break. Right now I’m sitting on a beach somewhere in Europe and I’m not coming back for a while.

Please don’t order expecting it to arrive soon. But if you still want to order and keep supporting us, we’d love that. Just know nothing ships until February 2027, so it won’t arrive in time for Christmas.

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"Probably Think This Card Is About You" Greeting Card

"Probably Think This Card Is About You" Greeting Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Father's Day From Your Favourite Child" Father's Day Card

"Happy Father's Day From Your Favourite Child" Father's Day Card

5.0 (4)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Fuck All From Santa" Christmas Card

"Fuck All From Santa" Christmas Card

5.0 (6)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Fresh Outta Fucks" Pin Badge

"Fresh Outta Fucks" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Hip Hip Replacement" Birthday Card

"Hip Hip Replacement" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"We All Appreciate The Shit Out Of You" Extra Large Thank You Card
Extra Large

"We All Appreciate The Shit Out Of You" Extra Large Thank You Card

$17.99

$17.99

In stock

"Thanks for Being a Fucking Delight" Thank You Card

"Thanks for Being a Fucking Delight" Thank You Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Shut the Fridge Door" Fridge Magnet

"Shut the Fridge Door" Fridge Magnet

5.0 (3)

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"Happy Birthday *Cough* Cunt" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday *Cough* Cunt" Birthday Card

5.0 (15)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Merry Christmas Bitch" Christmas Card

"Merry Christmas Bitch" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Mate" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Mate" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Not a Big Hugger" Pin Badge

"Not a Big Hugger" Pin Badge

5.0 (1)

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Serving This Much Cunt? At Your Age?" Birthday Card

"Serving This Much Cunt? At Your Age?" Birthday Card

5.0 (15)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Cunt's Fucked, But Merry Christmas" Christmas Card

"Cunt's Fucked, But Merry Christmas" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"You're Not a Housewife, You're a Hornbag" Greeting Card

"You're Not a Housewife, You're a Hornbag" Greeting Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Your Body Is Officially Out of the Warranty Period" Birthday Card

"Your Body Is Officially Out of the Warranty Period" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"You've Reproduced" Newborn Card

"You've Reproduced" Newborn Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"To You and Your Latest Chin" Birthday Card

"To You and Your Latest Chin" Birthday Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Birthday Wanker" Pin Badge

"Birthday Wanker" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"You Cotton-Headed Ninny Muggins" Christmas Card

"You Cotton-Headed Ninny Muggins" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Silently Correcting Your Grammar" Pin Badge

"Silently Correcting Your Grammar" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Happy Birthday in an Irish Accent" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday in an Irish Accent" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"__ and Still a Badass Bitch" Birthday Card

"__ and Still a Badass Bitch" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Nigerian Prince" Mother's Day Card

"Nigerian Prince" Mother's Day Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Two Grooms Are Better Than One" Wedding Card

"Two Grooms Are Better Than One" Wedding Card

5.0 (2)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Fight Like a Married Couple for Reals" Engagement Card

"Fight Like a Married Couple for Reals" Engagement Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Fa La La La La La Fuck" Christmas Card

"Fa La La La La La Fuck" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Thanks and Shit" Thank You Card

"Thanks and Shit" Thank You Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Adios, Bitch" Farewell Card

"Adios, Bitch" Farewell Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"I Didn't Ask To Be Born Hot" Pin Badge

"I Didn't Ask To Be Born Hot" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"10/10 Friend. Would Recommend." Friendship Card

"10/10 Friend. Would Recommend." Friendship Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"To Me, You Are a Cunt" Christmas Card

"To Me, You Are a Cunt" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Girt By Cunts" Fridge Magnet

"Girt By Cunts" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"To You and Your Vape Addiction" Birthday Card

"To You and Your Vape Addiction" Birthday Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"This Wedding Seems Kinda Gay" Wedding Card

"This Wedding Seems Kinda Gay" Wedding Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"I Love You And Your Big ... Personality" Valentines Card

"I Love You And Your Big ... Personality" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Old Fart" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Old Fart" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Never Leave Me, Cause I'll Find You" Valentines Card

"Never Leave Me, Cause I'll Find You" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Ew, David" Pin Badge

"Ew, David" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Allergic to Cunts" Pin Badge

"Allergic to Cunts" Pin Badge

5.0 (2)

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Massive Cunt" Pin Badge

"Massive Cunt" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Cunt Intolerant" Fridge Magnet

"Cunt Intolerant" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"Alexa, Search Christmas Cards For Whores" Christmas Card

"Alexa, Search Christmas Cards For Whores" Christmas Card

5.0 (2)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Ya Gronk" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Ya Gronk" Birthday Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday To You and Your Low Iron Levels" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday To You and Your Low Iron Levels" Birthday Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Not Today, Satan" Pin Badge

"Not Today, Satan" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Thanks for Being the World's Goodest Teacher" Thank You Card

"Thanks for Being the World's Goodest Teacher" Thank You Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"She Believed She Could" Fridge Magnet

"She Believed She Could" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"Do You Need Head?" Valentines Card

"Do You Need Head?" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Clothes Are 100% Off Tonight" Valentines Card

"Clothes Are 100% Off Tonight" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock