Best Selling Greeting Cards
These are the greeting cards people actually buy, which says a lot about the collective state of humanity. From savage to slightly sweet (but still savage), these best-sellers have made people laugh, cry, and question your friendship. Want a card with proven insult-to-impact ratio? You’re in the right place.
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"I Have Room for One More Traumatic Core Memory" Farewell Card
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"It's a Circle Back at Your Earliest Convenience" Farewell Card
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"It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Blurst of Times" Farewell Card
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"Yeah, There's a Super Cheap Auto Voucher Inside" Father's Day Card
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"You're Like the Father I've Always Had" Father's Day Card
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"Your the Best Teacher" Thank You Card
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"Thank You. Whatever. Shut Up. Don't Look At Me." Thank You Card
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"You're There for Me When I'm at My Lowest" Thank You Card
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"It's Time for Adventure Before Dementia" Farewell Card
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"Under New Management. See Wife for More Details." Retirement Card
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"President of the Burnt-Out Mum Club" Mother's Day Card
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"To the World's Okayest Wife" Greeting Card
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"Happy Birthday. Whatever. Shut Up. Don't Look At Me." Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday to My Cunt of a Brother" Birthday Card
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"They Yee'd Their Last Haw" Sympathy Card
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"I Got You a Gift, But It's Stupid" Greeting Card
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"I'm So Glad I Judged a Book By Its Cover" Valentines Card
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"It's Always Business Doing a Pleasure With You" Valentines Card
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"I Trimmed My Fingernails for This?" Greeting Card
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"So How's the Job Search Going?" Graduation Card
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"Mandatory" Graduation Card
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"Thank God You're a Handyman" Father's Day Card
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"I Don't Think Anyone Else Noticed the Nepotism" Congratulations Card
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"I Love You With All of My *Checks Notes* Heart" Valentines Card
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"This Wedding Could've Been an Email" Wedding Card
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"Happy Birthday to the King of Banter" Birthday Card
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"This is a Stealth Card. I'll Keep Your Birthday a Secret." Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday You Pansexual Bitch" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday You Nonbinary Bitch" Birthday Card
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"Blonde Lets Her Boyfriend Feel Her Big Natural Birthday Wishes" Birthday Card
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"I Come in Peace (You're Peace)" Valentines Card
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"You Will Have It All, My Empire of Dirt" Valentines Card
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"The Way to a Man's Heart is His Stomach" Valentines Card
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"Could You Send It in an Email Please?" Valentines Card
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"Do the Carpets Match the Drapes?" Valentines Card
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"Y'all Fuck With a White Boy or What?" Valentines Card
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"Try Not to Have a Birthday Challenge" Birthday Card
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"To You and Your Sleeper Build" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday Slugger" Birthday Card
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"I Just Want to Be Part of Your Symphony" Valentines Card
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"I Hope This Card Finds You Laid" Greeting Card
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"Sorry They Ditched You for Heaven" Sympathy Card
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"Looks Like You Balled So Hard They Found You" Sympathy Card
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"Business in the Front, Party in the Sensible Venue" Celebration Card
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"The Printer Couldn't Be Bothered Finishing Your Card" Birthday Card
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