Best Selling Greeting Cards
These are the greeting cards people actually buy, which says a lot about the collective state of humanity. From savage to slightly sweet (but still savage), these best-sellers have made people laugh, cry, and question your friendship. Want a card with proven insult-to-impact ratio? You’re in the right place.
"Happy Birthday Dick Butt" Birthday Card
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"A Nail-Biting Rollercoaster" Friendship Card
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"You've Survived Worse On a Night Out" Get Well Card
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"You Did Have Sexual Relations With That Woman" Newborn Card
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"You Bring Tears To My Meat Pie" Valentines Card
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"I'm Dreaming of a Shite Christmas" Christmas Card
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"Your Phone Must Be Blowing Up ... Right?" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday To You and Your Bingo Wings" Birthday Card
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"Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want To Come" Celebration Card
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"Sorry Your Party Got COVID Cancelled" Celebration Card
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"Should've Closed Your Legs Sis" Newborn Card
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"I Like You a Lot Better Now You're Off the Gear" Congratulations Card
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"Putting Up With My Little Shits" Thank You Card
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"Good Luck With Whatever It Is You Are Doing" Encouragement Card
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"The Only Thing Saving This Year Is You" Valentines Card
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"I Would Pay Someone to Move Heaven and Earth For You" Valentines Card
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"I Sanitised Your Present, Happy Birthday" Birthday Card
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"Part of My Obnoxious White Bridal Party" Wedding Card
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"Me: Happy Birthday" Birthday Card
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"Asshole To The World, Sweetheart To His Girl" Valentines Card
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"Way Better Than the Casting Couch" New Job Card
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"Happy Birthday You Pomme Bastard" Birthday Card
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"Christmas Was So Last Year" Christmas Card
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"Sorry This Card Isn't Filled with Nutella" Greeting Card
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"Happy Father's Day To You and Your Empty Nest" Father's Day Card
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"My Kelly or My Michelle" Friendship Card
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"If You Can't Say Something Nice, Come Sit Next To Me" Friendship Card
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"It's Only Your Birthday" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday To You and Your Child Bearing Hips" Birthday Card
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"Happy Smother's Day" Mother's Day Card
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"You're The Best Mum or Dad Ever" Greeting Card
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"I Hope There's a Good Nibbly Table At This Party" Celebration Card
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"Two Fives Make a Ten" Valentines Card
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"Happy Valentine's Day Loser" Valentines Card
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"You're Finally Not Just The Bridesmaid" Wedding Card
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"Let's Get Ready To Stumble" Celebration Card
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"Santa Left The Receipt In The Box" Christmas Card
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"Time To Step Your Pussy Up" Encouragement Card
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"Happy Birthday Tosser" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday To You and Your Broke Ass" Birthday Card
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"Father Time Has Not Been Kind" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday To You And Your Blue Balls" Birthday Card
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"You Know Exactly Where To Find My Fantastic Beast" Valentines Card
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"Not All Those Who Wander Are Hipster Cunts" Farewell Card
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"I Can't Wait To Attend, Ruin and Not Remember Your Birthday Party" Birthday Card
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"You're Hired!" New Job Card
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"Congrats on the New Gig" New Job Card
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"Your Present Is a Kick To The Liver" Mother's Day Card
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"You're Not Completely Unhot" Valentines Card
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"Sorry This Card Isn't a Double Bacon Cheeseburger" Greeting Card
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