Best Selling Greeting Cards
These are the greeting cards people actually buy, which says a lot about the collective state of humanity. From savage to slightly sweet (but still savage), these best-sellers have made people laugh, cry, and question your friendship. Want a card with proven insult-to-impact ratio? You’re in the right place.
"Yeah, There's a BCF Voucher Inside" Father's Day Card
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"You're There for Me When I'm at My Lowest" Thank You Card
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"It's Time for Adventure Before Dementia" Farewell Card
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"May the Divorce Be With You" Congratulations Card
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"President of the Burnt-Out Mum Club" Mother's Day Card
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"You Won't Hear Me Over Your Ringtone" Mother's Day Card
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"This is Your Villain Origin Story" Sympathy Card
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"I Got You a Gift, But It's Stupid" Greeting Card
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"You Really Activate My Cuteness Aggression" Valentines Card
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"It's Always Business Doing a Pleasure With You" Valentines Card
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"In You, I Thrust" Valentines Card
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"I Just Douched" Greeting Card
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"Wake Me Up When All This Shit is Over" Christmas Card
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"Piss on the World, Hell" Christmas Card
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"Bachelor of Fine Ass" Graduation Card
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"To My Late Husband" Birthday Card
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"Libras Are Incapable of Happiness" Birthday Card
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"Put a Lot of Ball Sweat and Tears Into This" Congratulations Card
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"I Wanna Share All My Special Interests With You Forever" Valentines Card
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"You're So Hot, Just Like Our Dying Planet" Valentines Card
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"I Voted 'Yes' for This?" Wedding Card
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"Happy Birthday to the King of Banter" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday You Pansexual Bitch" Birthday Card
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"What You Want for Your Birthday Dinner" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday to You and Your Boring Job" Birthday Card
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"It's Going to Be All Hands on Dick Tonight" Valentines Card
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"You're a Work of Art" Valentines Card
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"We Sure Are Cute for Two Ugly People" Valentines Card
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"You're a Belter of a Woman" Valentines Card
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"I Want Your Boy Germs" Valentines Card
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"He Sees You When You're Sleeping Around" Christmas Card
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"Happy Halloween You Spooky Bitch" Greeting Card
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"The Gods Are Most Pleased You Have Finally Bore a Male" Newborn Card
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"I Love What You Haven't Done With the Place" Housewarming Card
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"If You Need Help Moving, I'm Busy That Day" Housewarming Card
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"It's Not Going on the Next Monopoly Board" Housewarming Card
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"Happy Birthday to You and Your Chooky Neck" Birthday Card
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"To the First Man I Ever Called Daddy" Father's Day Card
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"Why Does Somebody Not Know How To Flush a Toilet?" Greeting Card
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"Happy Birthday You Asexual Bitch" Birthday Card
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"My Curtains r Waiting" Valentines Card
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"Really? Right In Front of My Birthday?" Birthday Card
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"Chicks Before Pricks" Greeting Card
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"I Bet You Thought You'd Seen the Last of Me" Greeting Card
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"Man Shall Not Lie With Another Man But Go Off" Wedding Card
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"You Sure Beat Choking the Chicken" Valentines Card
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