Best Selling Greeting Cards
These are the greeting cards people actually buy, which says a lot about the collective state of humanity. From savage to slightly sweet (but still savage), these best-sellers have made people laugh, cry, and question your friendship. Want a card with proven insult-to-impact ratio? You’re in the right place.
"In the Name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit" Father's Day Card
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"Your the Best Teacher" Thank You Card
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"As Per My Last Email, Happy Retirement" Retirement Card
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"Happy Birthday. Whatever. Shut Up. Don't Look At Me." Birthday Card
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"I'm Coming to the Cottage" Valentines Card
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"I'm Pregnant. Just Kidding" Valentines Card
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"Happy Valentine's Day to My Current Wife" Valentines Card
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"Happy Valentine's Day to My Current Husband" Valentines Card
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"The Cheek, the Nerve, the Gall, the Audacity and the Gumption" Greeting Card
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"Doesn't Seem Any Bigger Than the Mauretania" Birthday Card
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"To My Late Wife" Birthday Card
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"Monogamy? In This Economy?" Engagement Card
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"I Don't Think Anyone Else Noticed the Nepotism" Congratulations Card
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"Congrats *Cough* Nepo Baby" Congratulations Card
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"The Way You Fed Me and Stopped Me From Dying" Mother's Day Card
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"I'm Sorry, Your Birthday Isn't on My Moodboard" Birthday Card
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"At This Point, You Surviving Another Year Feels Personal" Birthday Card
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"I Didn't Know Love Until I Met You and Now It's Too Late" Valentines Card
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"You're a Ripper of a Bloke" Valentines Card
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"Happy Fucking Whatever" Extra Large Greeting Card
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"My Designated Sacrifice for Intruders" Valentines Card
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"Excelenté Casa Puta" Housewarming Card
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"Life is Really Sticking It In Dry, Isn't It?" Sympathy Card
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"To My Walking Bank Account" Father's Day Card
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"From Your Designated 'Son Daughter'" Father's Day Card
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"I Hope the Batteries Are Fresh for Your Birthday" Birthday Card
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"Right in the Pussy" Newborn Card
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"You is Rizz'n" Easter Card
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"Easter? I Hardly Know Her" Easter Card
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"Jesus Died For This?" Easter Card
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"You Got a Cute Face, Chubby Waist, Thick Legs In Shape" Valentines Card
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"We Go Together Like Alcohol and Depression" Valentines Card
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"So Cute. Does It Know Fetch Yet?" Newborn Card
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"After The Hardest Flop Comes The Biggest Slay" Encouragement Card
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"I Need The Name of The Demon You Made a Deal With" Birthday Card
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"Dad, You're Officially Back To Being Cool Again" Father's Day Card
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"Uncle, Thanks For Raising Me Like a Father" Father's Day Card
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"Doesn't Matter How Old You Get, You're Still Boring" Birthday Card
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"You're My Long Stabby Thing" Valentines Card
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"Happy Father's Day, Thanks For The Trauma" Father's Day Card
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"You Survived My Post Nut Clarity" Valentines Card
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"They Always Tell Us to Shop Small, So This is All I Bought" Greeting Card
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"This Marks The End of Your Flop Era" Greeting Card
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"You're Leaving? Get Outta Town!" Farewell Card
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"You're Like a Work of Art" Valentines Card
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"Being With You Is Like My Very Own Squid Game" Valentines Card
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"Trust Your Gut, Lord Knows There's A Lot of It" Encouragement Card
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"Get Confident Stupid" Encouragement Card
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