Best Selling Greeting Cards
These are the greeting cards people actually buy, which says a lot about the collective state of humanity. From savage to slightly sweet (but still savage), these best-sellers have made people laugh, cry, and question your friendship. Want a card with proven insult-to-impact ratio? You’re in the right place.
"Look How Far You've Come, You Are Much Older" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday You Little Ripper" Birthday Card
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"Generic Birthday Card" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday to My Cunt of a Sister" Birthday Card
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"Since We're Both Here, We Might As Well..." Valentines Card
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"Trying to Get a Load of This Guy" Valentines Card
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"Be Still, My Beating Vagina" Valentines Card
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"Whatever the Fuck is Wrong With You is Way Hotter" Valentines Card
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"You Think You Know Every-Fucking-Thing" Graduation Card
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"I've Got a Rash You Can Look At" Graduation Card
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"Sorry I Gave You Issues, Dad" Father's Day Card
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"Please Don't Leave Me With These Bitches" Farewell Card
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"I Parked This Card in the Envelope" Greeting Card
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"Not You Being Proposed To" Engagement Card
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"You Are a Mother. This is a Day. Here is a Card." Mother's Day Card
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"Thanks for Never Leaving Me in a Basket" Mother's Day Card
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"My Favourite Place is With You and Anywhere With Wifi" Valentines Card
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"Congrats on Your Big Fat Greek Wedding" Wedding Card
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"Marriage, Because Your Shitty Day Doesn't Have to End at Work" Wedding Card
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"Hmm, This Birthday Party Seems Kinda Gay" Birthday Card
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"You're Aging Like Fine Wine" Birthday Card
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"You've Now Entered the Dark Ages" Birthday Card
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"Cute Twink Takes His Boyfriend's Huge Birthday Wishes" Birthday Card
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"We Still Like Each Other After All These Years" Valentines Card
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"I Want Your Girl Germs" Valentines Card
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"I'm Frothing at the Gash for You" Valentines Card
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"The Horse You Rode in on Can Stay" Farewell Card
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"Happy... *Takes Nap* ...Birthday" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday Hag" Birthday Card
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"I Hope This Card Finds You Drunk" Greeting Card
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"Congrats on Your Big Fat Greek Engagement" Engagement Card
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"Sorry This Card Isn't a Midori Splice" Greeting Card
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"The Gays Have Officially Moved In" Housewarming Card
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"Aww, I Really Shouldn't Have" Greeting Card
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"Thanks for Never Speaking to the Manager" Greeting Card
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"Mandatory" Mother's Day Card
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"I'm No Gynaecologist, But I Know a Cunt When I See One" Greeting Card
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"Trusted The Ho" Valentines Card
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"Happy Birthday To Our Test-Run" Birthday Card
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"I Bleached My Asshole For This" Celebration Card
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"Happy Birthday To You and Your Bad Posture" Birthday Card
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"Your Parents Totally Banged On New Year's Eve" Birthday Card
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"You Give My Crotch A Headache" Valentines Card
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"I'll Play My Blue Eyes White _______" Valentines Card
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"Here's To Another Crappy Year" Christmas Card
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