Best Selling Greeting Cards
These are the greeting cards people actually buy, which says a lot about the collective state of humanity. From savage to slightly sweet (but still savage), these best-sellers have made people laugh, cry, and question your friendship. Want a card with proven insult-to-impact ratio? You’re in the right place.
"Born On April Fool's Day" Birthday Card
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"Tonight You're Getting Dinner and a Ho" Valentines Card
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"You Really Blitz My Chakras" Valentines Card
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"Have a Camp Christmas" Christmas Card
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"I Bought This While On-wine Shopping" Greeting Card
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"You're My Coping Mechanism" Valentines Card
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"Merry Christmas To You and Your Seasonal Depression" Christmas Card
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"Let's Stay The Fuck Away From Each Other" Christmas Card
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"Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Corona" Christmas Card
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"Sorry This Card Isn't a True Crime Podcast" Greeting Card
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"I Wanna Scream at Your Butt" Valentines Card
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"I Love You to the Couch and Back" Valentines Card
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"You Ain't Never Had a Friend Like Me" Friendship Card
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"Luck is for Losers" Encouragement Card
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"Sorry This Card Isn't a Cordless Dyson" Greeting Card
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"I Hope This is a Red Wedding" Wedding Card
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"Way To Go, It's Your Last Chemo" Encouragement Card
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"Happy Birthday Leadfoot" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday To You and Your Cankles" Birthday Card
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"I Hope The Pollen Count Is Low At This Party" Celebration Card
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"You Fixed My Trainwreck of a Heart" Valentines Card
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"If You Wanna Be My Lover" Valentines Card
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"Happy Birthday To You and Your Daddy Issues" Birthday Card
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"You Chose Books, I Chose Looks" Graduation Card
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"I'm Sorry You Have To Go" Farewell Card
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"The World Won't Know What Hit It" Farewell Card
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"Skimmed Your Resume" New Job Card
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"Shit, That Sucks" Sympathy Card
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"Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, Sorry" Apology Card
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"I Fucked Up Bad" Apology Card
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"About Time You Moved The Fuck Out" Housewarming Card
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"Did You Say Party House?" Housewarming Card
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"You Definitely Look Like You Need to Retire" Retirement Card
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"Will You Tame The Bridezilla?" Wedding Card
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"Try Not To Eat The Cake" Birthday Card
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"Mazel Tov!" Bar Mitzvah Card
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"Thanks For Accepting Me The Way I Am" Father's Day Card
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"Happy Birthday Prick" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday You Son of a Bitch" Birthday Card
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"To The Luckiest Girl On The Planet" Valentines Card
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"Let's Be Lonely Together" Valentines Card
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"Happy Birthday Bimbo" Birthday Card
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"Hasn't Been Your Day" Sympathy Card
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"Happy Birthday You Smelly Hippy" Birthday Card
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"Happy Birthday Smart-Ass" Birthday Card
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"Happy Second Sweet Sixteen" Birthday Card
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"Did You Fink Daddy Would Forget His Kitten's Birfday?" Birthday Card
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"It's a Circle Back at Your Earliest Convenience" Farewell Card
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"Hang in There, Bitch" Encouragement Card
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