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    Best Selling Greeting Cards

    These are the greeting cards people actually buy, which says a lot about the collective state of humanity. From savage to slightly sweet (but still savage), these best-sellers have made people laugh, cry, and question your friendship. Want a card with proven insult-to-impact ratio? You’re in the right place.

    2030 Results

    2030 Results

    "Your Illness is Chronic, But Your Ass is Iconic" Get Well Card

    $6.99

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    "You're One Badass Mother" Mother's Day Card

    $6.99

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    "Mercury Was Never in Retrograde, You're Just a Cunt" Friendship Card

    $6.99

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    "Tonight You're Getting Dinner and a Blow" Valentines Card

    $6.99

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    "I Bought This In October" Christmas Card

    $6.99

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    "Sorry You Work in Retail" Christmas Card

    $6.99

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    "I Hate To See You Leave" Farewell Card

    $6.99

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    "It's a Baby" Newborn Card

    "It's a Baby" Newborn Card

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    "Happy Birthday To You and Your Rock-Hard, Bland Vegan Cake" Birthday Card

    $6.99

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    "Congrats On Your Little Bundle Of Terror" Newborn Card

    $6.99

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    "Happy Birthday Idiot" Birthday Card

    "Happy Birthday Idiot" Birthday Card

    $6.99

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    "Can I Slytherin your Hufflepuff?" Valentines Card

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    "Congrats on Getting Outta This Shithole" New Job Card

    $6.99

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    "You're A Mess But I Love You" Valentines Card

    $6.99

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    "Yas Kween" Friendship Card

    "Yas Kween" Friendship Card

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    "You Guys Make Me Sick" Wedding Card

    "You Guys Make Me Sick" Wedding Card

    $6.99

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    "You're So Gay" Valentines Card

    "You're So Gay" Valentines Card

    $6.99

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    "Be Merry God Dammit" Christmas Card

    "Be Merry God Dammit" Christmas Card

    4.7 (7)

    $6.99

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    "Happy Birthday Fatty" Birthday Card

    "Happy Birthday Fatty" Birthday Card

    $6.99

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    "Thanks for BCF-ing Mum" Father's Day Card

    $6.99

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    "One Year Older and Still a Bitch" Birthday Card

    $6.99

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    "Please Don't Leave Me With These Cunts" Farewell Card

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    "Every Now and Then, Someone Amazing Comes Along" Valentines Card

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    "It's Giving Married" Wedding Card

    "It's Giving Married" Wedding Card

    $6.99

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    "Shout Out to Your Enormous Schlong" Valentines Card

    $6.99

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    "Merry Christmas, This Card is Your Present" Christmas Card

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    "If You Play Michael Bublé One More Time" Christmas Card

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    "My Mum Bought This Card for Me" Greeting Card

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    "Home Sweet Homo" Housewarming Card

    "Home Sweet Homo" Housewarming Card

    $6.99

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    "Alexa, Search Birthday Cards for Whores" Birthday Card

    $6.99

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    "I'm Pregnant. Just Kidding" Mother's Day Card

    "I'm Pregnant. Just Kidding" Mother's Day Card

    5.0 (1)

    $6.99

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    "Gone and Already Forgotten" Farewell Card

    $6.99

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    "Happy Birthday Cobber" Birthday Card

    "Happy Birthday Cobber" Birthday Card

    5.0 (15)

    $6.99

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    "Happy Birthday To You and Your Pretty Privilege" Birthday Card

    $6.99

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    "The Very Next Day, You Told Me You're Gay" Christmas Card

    $6.99

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    "Your Happiness and Success Disgusts Me" Congratulations Card

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    "A Boy's Best Friend is His Mother" Mother's Day Card

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    "Congrats on Your New Skin Dog" Newborn Card

    $6.99

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    "That's Not Who You Chose During Fuck, Marry, Kill" Wedding Card

    $6.99

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    "I Deleted Grindr For You" Valentines Card

    $6.99

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    "It's The 25th Of Motherfucking December Bitch" Christmas Card

    $6.99

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    "I Can't Wait To Attend, Ruin and Not Remember Your Wedding" Wedding Card

    $6.99

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    "Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent" Encouragement Card

    $6.99

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    "Spoilt, Messy, Ungrateful Ass" Greeting Card

    $6.99

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    "There Will Be No Safe Word Tonight" Valentines Card

    $6.99

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    "Happy Birthday Skittle Tits" Birthday Card

    $6.99

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    "Au Revoir Bitch" Farewell Card

    "Au Revoir Bitch" Farewell Card

    5.0 (1)

    $6.99

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    "Don't Get Your Tinsel in a Tangle" Christmas Card

    $6.99

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    "Netflix Password" Christmas Card

    "Netflix Password" Christmas Card

    $6.99

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    "Herpey Birthday" Birthday Card

    "Herpey Birthday" Birthday Card

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