on a break in Europe. all orders ship from February 2027.

we’re closed. (sort of.)

After 7 long years, we’re taking a proper break. Right now I’m sitting on a beach somewhere in Europe and I’m not coming back for a while.

Please don’t order expecting it to arrive soon. But if you still want to order and keep supporting us, we’d love that. Just know nothing ships until February 2027, so it won’t arrive in time for Christmas.

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"I Know This Is Going To Make Your Day Infinitely More Stressful" Valentines Card

"I Know This Is Going To Make Your Day Infinitely More Stressful" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Are We Going to Look at Christmas Lights?" Christmas Card

"Are We Going to Look at Christmas Lights?" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"You've Heard of Elf on a Shelf" Christmas Card

"You've Heard of Elf on a Shelf" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Cheers Bitch" Thank You Card

"Cheers Bitch" Thank You Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"You're Lucky I Even Turned Up" Greeting Card

"You're Lucky I Even Turned Up" Greeting Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Wait Until My Therapist Hears About This" Pin Badge

"Wait Until My Therapist Hears About This" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Merry Christmas You Silly Goose" Christmas Card

"Merry Christmas You Silly Goose" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"We're Saving PDFs, Not Saving Lives" Pin Badge

"We're Saving PDFs, Not Saving Lives" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Happy Birthday Homie" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Homie" Birthday Card

5.0 (15)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Houseplant Murderer" Fridge Magnet

"Houseplant Murderer" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"Generic" Thank You Card

"Generic" Thank You Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Let's Get Through This Christmas Bullshit" Christmas Card

"Let's Get Through This Christmas Bullshit" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday You Goddamn Beautiful Disaster" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday You Goddamn Beautiful Disaster" Birthday Card

5.0 (2)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Valentine's Day Bitch" Valentines Card

"Happy Valentine's Day Bitch" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Let's Get On the Naughty List" Christmas Card

"Let's Get On the Naughty List" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Merry Christmas Bitches" Christmas Card

"Merry Christmas Bitches" Christmas Card

5.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Nothing For You Whore" Christmas Card

"Nothing For You Whore" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Sweetie Darling" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Sweetie Darling" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Hoe" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Hoe" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Nutsack" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Nutsack" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Nerd" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Nerd" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Last Christmas, I Gave You a Card" Christmas Card

"Last Christmas, I Gave You a Card" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Thanks for Ignoring All My Red Flags" Valentines Card

"Thanks for Ignoring All My Red Flags" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Surprised I Bought You a Card" Greeting Card

"Surprised I Bought You a Card" Greeting Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Don't Be Weird Today" Fridge Magnet

"Don't Be Weird Today" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"You've Always Been Like a Mother to Me" Mother's Day Card

"You've Always Been Like a Mother to Me" Mother's Day Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Now Gimme That Tit" Mother's Day Card

"Now Gimme That Tit" Mother's Day Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Father's Day, You Handsome Motherfucker" Father's Day Card

"Happy Father's Day, You Handsome Motherfucker" Father's Day Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Thanks for Having an Open Bar" Wedding Card

"Thanks for Having an Open Bar" Wedding Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Congrats on Your New Shit Machine" Newborn Card

"Congrats on Your New Shit Machine" Newborn Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"You're Dead To Us" Extra Large Farewell Card
Extra Large

"You're Dead To Us" Extra Large Farewell Card

5.0 (1)

$17.99

$17.99

In stock

"You Leaving Was Not on My Vision Board" Farewell Card

"You Leaving Was Not on My Vision Board" Farewell Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Had a Breakdown, Bon Appétit" Birthday Card

"Had a Breakdown, Bon Appétit" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Ain't Nothing Gonna Break My Stride" Fridge Magnet

"Ain't Nothing Gonna Break My Stride" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"Let's Get Fucked Up" Fridge Magnet

"Let's Get Fucked Up" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"You Can Do This" Fridge Magnet

"You Can Do This" Fridge Magnet

$4.60

$4.60

In stock

"Happy Easter, You Hot Cross Cunt" Easter Card

"Happy Easter, You Hot Cross Cunt" Easter Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Merry Cost of Living Crisis" Christmas Card

"Merry Cost of Living Crisis" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday to my Favourite Nephew" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday to my Favourite Nephew" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Sorry About Your Other Daughter" Father's Day Card

"Sorry About Your Other Daughter" Father's Day Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Congrats on the Baby, Your Boobs Look Great" Newborn Card

"Congrats on the Baby, Your Boobs Look Great" Newborn Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Cheers For The Womb" Mother's Day Card

"Cheers For The Womb" Mother's Day Card

3.0 (1)

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"You're Gonna Make the Best Dilf" Newborn Card

"You're Gonna Make the Best Dilf" Newborn Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Happy Birthday Fuckface" Birthday Card

"Happy Birthday Fuckface" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Let's Get Fucking Christmasy" Christmas Card

"Let's Get Fucking Christmasy" Christmas Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"Sounds Like a Bad Idea... What Time?" Pin Badge

"Sounds Like a Bad Idea... What Time?" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Jingle My Bells" Pin Badge

"Jingle My Bells" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"Fuck Off" Pin Badge

"Fuck Off" Pin Badge

$4.50

$4.50

In stock

"I Ain't Spending Any Time On It" Valentines Card

"I Ain't Spending Any Time On It" Valentines Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock

"To You and Your Ridiculously Good Genes" Birthday Card

"To You and Your Ridiculously Good Genes" Birthday Card

$6.99

$6.99

In stock