on a break in Europe. all orders ship from February 2027.

we’re closed. (sort of.)

After 7 long years, we’re taking a proper break. Right now I’m sitting on a beach somewhere in Europe and I’m not coming back for a while.

Please don’t order expecting it to arrive soon. But if you still want to order and keep supporting us, we’d love that. Just know nothing ships until February 2027, so it won’t arrive in time for Christmas.

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Love Cards

361 Results

361 Results

"We Still Like Each Other After All These Years" Valentines Card

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"I Want Your Girl Germs" Valentines Card

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"I'm Frothing at the Gash for You" Valentines Card

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"You Give My Crotch A Headache" Valentines Card

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"I'll Play My Blue Eyes White _______" Valentines Card

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"You Really Blitz My Chakras" Valentines Card

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"You're My Coping Mechanism" Valentines Card

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"I Wanna Scream at Your Butt" Valentines Card

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"I Love You to the Couch and Back" Valentines Card

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"I'm In Love With the Shape of You" Valentines Card

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"Presented With Much Better Options, I Would Still Choose You" Valentines Card

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"I Hope This Card Finds You Naked" Valentines Card

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"I Love Long Romantic Walks to the Couch With You" Valentines Card

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"I'm Pregnant. Just Kidding" Valentines Card

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"Happy Valentine's Day to My Current Wife" Valentines Card

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"Happy Valentine's Day to My Current Husband" Valentines Card

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"You're So Hot, Just Like Our Dying Planet" Valentines Card

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"I Didn't Know Love Until I Met You and Now It's Too Late" Valentines Card

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"You're a Ripper of a Bloke" Valentines Card

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"I Want Your Boy Germs" Valentines Card

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"My Designated Sacrifice for Intruders" Valentines Card

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"You Got a Cute Face, Chubby Waist, Thick Legs In Shape" Valentines Card

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"You Sure Beat Choking the Chicken" Valentines Card

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"You're My Long Stabby Thing" Valentines Card

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"You Survived My Post Nut Clarity" Valentines Card

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"You're Like a Work of Art" Valentines Card

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"Being With You Is Like My Very Own Squid Game" Valentines Card

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"Can I Borrow a Feeling?" Valentines Card

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"You Make My Ovaries Scream For Mercy" Valentines Card

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"I Got Issues and One of Them is Owbadineedjah" Valentines Card

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"You, You and Your Pussy Got Plans Tonight?" Valentines Card

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"I May Not Be Your First Girlfriend" Valentines Card

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"Your Hole Is Always The Goal" Valentines Card

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"You Wove Giving Daddy Wandom Ewections" Valentines Card

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"I Went to Cutie Patootie Town and Everyone Knew You" Valentines Card

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"I'd Like to Approach You With Romantic Intent" Valentines Card

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"Happy Valentine's Day To My Emergency Contact" Valentines Card

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"I'm Done Circling Back, I'm Ready To Touch Base" Valentines Card

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"You Got Me Hook, Line, and Sphincter" Valentines Card

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"You Really Activate My Cuteness Aggression" Valentines Card

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"It's Always Business Doing a Pleasure With You" Valentines Card

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"In You, I Thrust" Valentines Card

"In You, I Thrust" Valentines Card

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"Money Focused Love Languages" Valentines Card

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"I Just Douched" Greeting Card

"I Just Douched" Greeting Card

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"I Wanna Share All My Special Interests With You Forever" Valentines Card

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"It's Going to Be All Hands on Dick Tonight" Valentines Card

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"You're a Work of Art" Valentines Card

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"We Sure Are Cute for Two Ugly People" Valentines Card

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"You're a Belter of a Woman" Valentines Card

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"My Curtains r Waiting" Valentines Card

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